Things will be different now

I cannot run away from what is approaching, I have to face it. This pain is needed for my growth and journey. True it hurts like hell now and I wish I could skip past this point, but I need this to happen. Next time I will remember this point and be more careful. I know that there is more to life after this moment. Though this moment feels like it is going to last for a lifetime, and I doubt I will find happiness again. I remember that as long as I am alive there is opportunity for love to happen again.

As unbearable as it is right now, if God willing I will have a tomorrow.

Tomorrow I will continue to deal with it, the consequences and the fruits from the lesson. It won’t be pleasant tomorrow but I will make it through and know that the day after is coming.

Depending on how fast my heart heals it might only be a few tomorrows that will carry tears. However, there is a possibility the tomorrows could last months. My heart will take the time it needs, it will not rush. So even though it might be awhile I still need to remember healing is happening.

If I keep on working on the process, taking the time I need and moving forward. There will come a point that my heart won’t hurt as bad. The time that seemed to stop because of the heartache will begin to move again. I’ll smile and laugh again, from the bottom of my heart. I will have an again.

I look forward to that future moment when I open my eyes and can see clearly again. My heart will be at peace once more. If it does not happen tomorrow then there will be another tomorrow. I won’t count how many tomorrows it takes, I’ll just keep hoping.

When that tomorrow comes and I start again, it won’t be any better or worse compared to my how I used to love. It will just be different. Different things will bring tears and laughter. It will simply be a new way to live.

I know things will be different now, but I’ll be alright.

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