It’s easy to keep going when people are watching, giving you positive vibes and feedback. Things don’t feel forced because the receptive audience will give you a round of applause at the end. You feel motivated about life and that you are progressing. Relying on hearing well done to know if you are on the right track seems harmless at the beginning but it leads to you becoming a people pleaser.
At first they loved everything about you from the way you tied your hair to the jokes you said. Then little comments about how if you did your hair always like that it would be better and if you went to more events people will think so and so of you.
These comments aren’t suggestions, they are molding barriers they want you to fit into. There is an image of you they like, and they plan on telling you how to get there. Not the current you, but the one who doesn’t talk back and does everything they say.
See the nice words had buttered you up, you enjoyed hearing them and they knew it. You wanting to please will do anything to keep those reassuring words coming.
Even if it meant tieing your hair in that way that gave you a headache constantly because you knew they expected it.
Turning up to places when they call and always saying yes even when you are tired.
You would rather continue in this way because approval is comforting and you just want someone to need you. Anyone will do as long as they look at you and tell you want you want to hear.